It's been more than a year since the last time I really liked someone. And now that I do, of course, it wouldn't be fair if it's not complicated. Life has always been like that for me. I prayed for this moment to come, for a sign that it is still possible for me to hope for a relationship, and now that it's here, I do not know what to do.
It has been a very long time, and I couldn't remember if this is possible... to like someone so much that you couldn't get him off your head. It has only been 4 days since the day I met him, but just one night I spent with him in his room (with his friends) intensified what I felt. This could be temporary, and after a couple of days, I'd be reading this and laugh at myself for writing, but who cares. I've always poured my heart out in this blog.
This guy, who has been nice to me. This guy whose smile mesmerizes me. I don't know how he does it but every time he smiles, I couldn't stop staring at him. There's this sincerity in him when he does that. But more than the physical aspects, he has a good heart. Maybe that's what makes me like him more. He's not arrogant, he's accommodating, and very sincere with his words. He had his heart broken by someone, but he still looks at things positively.
There are a lot of things to know about him, I am hoping that I'd still get the chance to know him more, but at the rate of how things are going, I don't think it'll happen anytime soon. A close friend of mine (housemate) also likes him, and they had the chance to spend time together last night (he slept in our house, in my friend's room). Days ago, they were holding hands in public. Yeah, it's fucked up for me. I don't even have anything to hold on to aside from his best friends words and some text messages that could easily be misinterpreted, either way, a part of me is still wishing that I could say that he's mine... someday.
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